funny jokes

Teacher- Ladki ka paryavachi batao. Boy- Maal. Teacher- Wo kaise? Boy- Shashtron me likha hai ladki laxmi ka roop hoti hai, aur laxmi matlab Maal.
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Ek chor chori karne ek ghar me ghusa:


Malik-Kaun hai..??
Chor-Miyaau
Malik-Kaun hai..??
Chor-Miyaau
Malik-Kaun hai..??
Chor-Saale billi hun billi.....!!
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Man: Doctor my wife recently has lost her voice. What should I do to help her to get it back?
Doctor: Try to come home at 3 in the morning.
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Pati ke marane ke 2re din
patni ne paper me advtz diya
mere pati ki antim
yatra me aane ke liye
sub ko thanks.
Kavita
(Age-32, Hight- 5ft 2inch,
Rang-Gora, NO-Child)
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Santa sabji lene gya.
Sabji wala sbji pr pani chidk rha tha.
Santa intzar krta rha,
Jb kafi der ho gai to bola:-Agar ineh hosh aa gya ho to 1 kilo tol de...
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Boy to friend: Dekho voh ladki meri taraf dekh ke muskura rahi hai. 


Friend: Yeh to kutch bhi nahi, jab maine pehli bar tumari shakal dekhi thi to 3 din apni hassi nahi rok paya tha.
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if a girl get 98% mark her response,
kamina 2 mark or de deta to uska kya jata tha,
if boy gets 35% mark he says:
check karne wala farishta tha yaar:-)
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Dr.Ab tum bilkul thik ho gaye ho phir b kyo dar rahe ho?
Mariz: Ji, Jis gadi se mera accident hua tha uspe likha tha 'phir milenge'
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Teacher to boy:


1 taraf paisa,
1 taraf dimag


Kya hoga?


boy: paisa


teacher:galat, agar main hoti to dimag leti


boy: jiske pas jo nahi vo wahi leta he
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Cute prayer Child:god:Plz i don't want 3rd world war 
God:Y? u luv ur country so much?
Child -No God i am weak in history i can't study another war..:-(:-)..
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tags:funny jokes,funny,funny messages